‘The 9 Shittest Newborn Baby Presents’

‘Its another money box…..’ I sighed as I opened another present we had recieved for new born No3.

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Another high quality money box my arse!!

It is inevitable that you will become a minor celebrity when baby arrives.

Newly crowned parents should also brace themselves for the barage of cheap tat they will recieve!

Here are a few things to expect:

– Clothes that are too big, too small and/or totally tasteless

– A silver money box that looks like it has been bought off a trader at the local market – total cheap crap tat!

– A board game aimed at five years and over

– A cuddly toy that contains more choking hazards than a Ben Dover movie

– Presents that have obviously been recycled because they are shit

– Unnecessarily expensive gift bags that serve no other purpose than clogging up a shelf in one of your cupboards for years to come just in case you remember to reuse it.

– A sleep suit that is more suitable for a two year old.

– A mothercare gift card – I mean as if you havnt spent enough weekends in there already!!

– More flowers than you would find at a motorway service station

About Tom IdeasforDads

I am a 35-year old chap whose life just over four years ago changed forever – I became a Dad! I enjoy blogging about my family’s exploits with a humorous slant on things and I must admit I have a mischievous sense of humour and enjoy making my readers chuckle. Readers of my blog, which are both Dads and Mums, say they love the self deprecating humour interwoven with glimmers of useful advice and appreciate the ray of sunshine it brings to them. Although Daddy Bloggers are considered small fish in a very large Mummy Blogger pond, many Mums love reading my blog and even forward them on to their other halves :-)
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11 Responses to ‘The 9 Shittest Newborn Baby Presents’

  1. And Character clothing because obviously at 3 days old they have an appreciation of peppa pig/Mickey Mouse or worse stilL **shuddering*** Winnie the Pooh (deviant)

  2. Tom Briggs says:

    Ha ha! I guess you’ve been a little more unfortunate than us. Most of the things we were given when our sons were born were great – there have been a few items of tat that have gone straight to the local charity shop though!

  3. WallyMummy says:

    ahhh yes, but the gift bags are awesome for re-gifting so I count that one as a win for sure! Don’t forget wrong season clothing as well… what the fuck is up with that. Thanks for the snowsuit for my April born baby u nobbers. lol x

  4. Charlotte says:

    Present from my parents-in-law for son was a terrifying looking bear holding a handy choke hazard key! It’s the sort of thing I’d bin in an instant but has to sit up on the shelf just in case they notice…

  5. My brother in law got us an ‘it’s a girl’ card for our first born son because he couldn;t be arsed to go to another shop and get a boy one – oh yes and one of those teddies too

  6. sarah says:

    Oh and don’t forget ridiculously OTT gender-stereotyped gifts or heaven forbid football strips EUGH.

  7. mrsnige says:

    I hope you are going to follow this up with what you really wanted instead.

    I usually ask what is needed, or give cash.

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